They say having a dog is a little like having a baby…you know you have to feed it, clean up after it, occupy it etc…and since I now have a dog, I am learning how much work he actually is. Simba is great, I can’t complain, he came house trained and as he is three years old he doesn’t have the issues most “puppies” have. We are used to each other by now. We have been together three weeks and we love the crap out of each other and even though there are many times I feel like throwing him out the window cause he won’t stop licking me or my allergies are bugging me and He. Just. Won’t. Go. Away! In the end, I love him and I would lose it if anything happened to him. It’s why I wake up at 6:30 in the morning to walk him; it’s why I spent $120.00 for the vet to look at his paw even though he was already starting to walk better. We are bonded. I’d do anything for him.
I imagine it’s like having a child, but 100 times more intense. I know my baby will wake up a dozen times throughout the night, begging to be fed, searching aimlessly for the boob. Screaming intently until satisfied. I know there will be times I am so tired I’ll doubt my decision, to do it alone, I mean why would a sane, intelligent woman do that to herself? I’m sure as my child grows she or he will be mouthy because they will take after their mother, and as hard as I try – I am mouthy and it gets me in trouble – a lot. I also know that when they are holding my hand, or say “mama” for the first time, or take their first step, or sleep through the night, I know I will feel something so powerful, nothing will compare.
This time next year, I will have a dog, a new home (I’m moving in the spring) and, God willing, a new baby! I’m very excited and nervous and truth be told, scared shitless (see there goes that mouth again). For now, I can’t do anything except bond with Simba and let him know everyday someone (me) loves him.
This weekend I have to settle down a donor and have my final ultrasound (day 11) and then next week I meet with the Social Worker and ensure my donor sperm is being transferred to Next Steps. Everything will happen pretty quick once that takes place. Thank you all for joining me on this crazy intense journey!