I’ve decided to dedicate a blog to all the friends in my life throughout my decades because I’ve realized since my dads passing, and maybe even before that – back to when the ex and I broke up – that my friends are my family and they are such a diverse group of women (and some men) that I wouldn’t survive without them…so this blog is for you…for who? Well here I go:
I briefly keep in touch with friends pre-high school thanks to the social media world we now live in; friends like Amy whom I’ve known since birth and lived next door to well into my twenties, guys like Shaun who now live in the U.S, but texts me daily with biblical and self motivating speeches and of course my Sedgemount Drive neighbours who have supported and loved me as long as they’ve known me.
However my strongest friendships formed well into and after high school. But I’ll start with high school to give this blog a chronological order.
My strongest friendships from “the good old days of Cedarbrae” stem from two ladies Nancy and Kristi. Nancy has been my ally since ninth grade computer classe. We hung out in the same social circle and had an amazing summer filled with Spice Girls and Mikes Hard Lemonade (no officer we were not of age and I apologize profusely). Throughout the past twenty years we have had highs and lows, been close and grown apart and gotten close again, but at the end of the day this woman has a piece of my heart and I will never not have her in mine.
Now Kristilee, booboo, my love, is a different story altogether. We weren’t close in high school – at all. In fact it’s only been the last 4-5 years where my love and adoration for this amazing woman has grown. She is by far the strongest, most loving, bravest person I have met and I am SO grateful to call her one of my absolute soul mates. Without her, my life would be very different and even though I may not see her often, she is never far from my thoughts.
While in highschool I started dating a guy who I was convinced would be my husband and father of my children and I instantly became friends with his sister Rochelle. The relationship died soon after I graduated University (but 4.5 years ain’t bad) but my friendship with Rochelle and her husband David has grown to the point where I consider her my sister and him, my brother. I treat her kids like my own and constantly introduce them as my god-kids because even though religiously and legally they may not be, in my heart they are and I know in Rochelles heart they are too. She is the one who gave me the shoe fetish (103 and counting Ro!) and who made regular pedicures a reality.
Moving away to Peterborough at 19 and going to University changed a lot of my friendships. I met people whom I didn’t have a lot in common with yet fell for anyway. Friendships blossomed with five in particular: Brendan (Brendo), Derek, Nicole, Bev and Nathan. I spent my whole four years of University loving and hating these people equally. Because of our differences, we fought like cats and dogs, but at the end of the day, I respected these people and cared about each of them as individuals.
After our four years together, we all moved across Ontario, back to our respective hometowns or further and these friendships slowly fell apart…except with Brendo. My zookeeper bff has remained in my life and fought to stay in it. I know I disappoint him repeatedly with not being as involved in our friendship as I should be, but I hope he knows how much I care about him and that I am WELL aware that words are meaningless and I hope to spend more time with him and his new wife very soon.
For the first 25 years of my life I have had these great friendships with people I haven’t even mentioned here because time, distance (and a lack of Facebook pre-2006) made it very difficult to stay in touch, but since then…post University life I have made some friendships with people I have NO doubt will forever be in my world and whom I could not and would not want to live without.
When my ex and I started dating he was really getting involved in numerous baseball teams and I was trying to support him by attending his tournaments and game nights. Other girlfriends were there too, cheering on their men from the bleachers and I’ve met and become extremely close with three such ladies.
The first one I met was Erin, she is the angel who brought Simba into my world and whose couch I have slept on when the above ex left me 5 years later and moved on with his life, and who cradled me in her arms when my father passed away last year. She is the one who cried tears of joy with me when my house officially became my house and the one who sends me hilarious pictures throughout the day to make me smile. She started our introduction off with the following conversation:
E- hey, so do you smoke weed?
N – nope
E – like not on weekdays?
N- nope never…
And then she looked at me like I was a strange alien who had ceased to exist to her in that moment. We still giggle over it because her boyfriend (my realtor) was completely humiliated at that conversation, but honestly I thought it was great. We have had numerous hilarious conversations since then that have kept our friendship light, but tight!
I met Kim at a Provincial baseball tournament in September 2009. She was newly pregnant with her first baby and I didn’t know anything about her except she was dating Jeff, a guy on the team. I didn’t really get to know her all that well that weekend, but saw her a few more times at other games and her boyfriend and mine played together quite often so we consistently ended up on the bleachers cheering and joking around together. In October 2010, when the ex and I had separated, she invited me to Chicago to help her find her wedding dress and needing the distraction, I eagerly accepted. We’ve been close ever since and actually I was a bridesmaid in her 2012 wedding to Jeff and she is the amazing friend I just bought the cottage with. Needless to say I have no doubts that we will be friends for many years to come and I have thoroughly enjoyed watching her son and daughter come into the world and grow and develop into the sweetest children. Her and Jeff and the two kids feel like my family. I see them often and look forward to each visit!
Now Nancy (another Nancy – I know how many Nancy’s of our age could there possibly be?) I met through her (now) husband Travis who played ball with the ex and who lived next door to us with his ex girlfriend. I didn’t know Nancy for a long time and whether it was because of my friendship with her husband’s ex or she just didn’t like me, I don’t know why – but it took us awhile to catch up. However, now that the wedding is over, her first child has been born and we have gotten to know each other I am EXTREMELY grateful to Travis for bringing this woman into my world. She is strong and she is a fighter and she is a great mother and a loving wife. Anyone who knows Nancy is lucky…her dedication to her family and her job is inspiring. Because of her long work hours I don’t see her nearly as much as I want to, but thankfully she joined my book club and now I know I will see her at least once a month!!!
There are other friends I haven’t mentioned – Agnes and Rob who I met through work and who have infiltrated my world in the most positive way possible; Alexandra who I met while working at the library in my last year of high school and whom makes me blush and giggle while I live vicariously through her and of course Andrea who was very good friends with my ex and whose wedding made me cry tears of happiness as I witnessed her dreams came true. You four may not have a paragraph dedicated to our meeting and interactions, but you make me a better person for having known you!